i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
