Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
