just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Drake has all the answers
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
