it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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