the day after is always just damage control
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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