thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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