I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
