i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
We don't watch enough power rangers
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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