who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
