I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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