Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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