And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
