So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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