And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
