So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
