I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
