I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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