Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
