you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
