I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
