she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
