I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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