"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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