My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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