Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
