It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
