it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize