Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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