we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
