This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
