i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Alive.
So much puke
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
