So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
