Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
