How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
