Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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