How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize