Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize