Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
