oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
