I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
