Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
