sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize