another moral hangover. fuck.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
