last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
