The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
