i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
