he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
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