We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
