thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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