I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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